A map of meditation

The map and the territory

Alfred Korzybski famously said "the map is not the territory". Too true. I can stare at a map of Barcelona for hours, but I still have not had the experience of Barcelona. But a map is a truly useful thing and the yogis of yore have handed down a few that are still serviceable today as we journey the unknown territory of the spiritual journey. It is an irony that we must journey to the ends of the earth to find the goal is already right here! Then again, that is already marked on the maps.

By Unknown author - https://www.britishmuseum.org/collection/object/A_1940-0713-0-79, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=12813191

Just like the maps of physical geography there are different kinds ... street/road maps, topographical maps, street view, and so on. There are maps of the energetic body and maps of the Self as layers.

And then there is the map of meditation, or the Tattvas map, which is described in the Śiva Sūtra, but has its origins in the Samkhya school of philosophy.  

The beauty of this map is that we can number the elements, from one on, from either end, depending which you regard as your starting point and which is the destination.

Tattvas in Samkhya

The philosophical school of Samkhya, which is closely related to the philosophical school of "Yoga" ...  we can call it classical, or Patanjalian Yoga to distinguish it from the many other "yogas" that have developed over time ... describes the tattvas as far as one named Puruṣa. It is 25 if counting from the bottom. 

The Samkhyan school is dualistic, but non-theistic as there is no god. 

There is Prakṛti, often translated as "Nature", which evolves out into everything in the material world, down to the basic elements. The first step in the evolution into everything is the blossoming of Buddhi (Discrimination), the sense of an "I", me, of being separate, and the mind of sense processing and attention. Then there are five organs of knowledge, the organs of sensing, ears, skin, eyes, tongue and nose. Following on are the actions, pairs of "organs" and actions actually, mouth and speaking, hands and grasping, feet and ambulating, genitals and procreating, and bowels and eliminating. Then there are the seses themselves, sound, touch, appearance, flavour and odour. And finally, or primarily depending on which direction you are looking, are the elements, space, wind, fire, water and earth. So out of 25 tattvas, Prakṛti constitutes 24 of them!

And then there is Puruṣa, which you might call Soul, or "Individual Consciousness". 

Both are real. Puruṣa’s mistake is misidentifying as Prakṛti. The invitation is to put distance between you (as Puruṣa) and Prakṛti. 

Because Prakṛti is the material part, this school has a tendency to be body denying, world denying, ascetic, renunciate.

Classical Yoga differs from Samkhya mainly in being theistic, that is by allowing a deity, a supreme consciousness. 

Another perspective - Advaita Vedanta

Samkhyan philosophy is evident very early in the Vedic literature, but in the Upaniṣads another "school" is birthed, that of Vedanta, meaning the "end of the Veda". Vedanta divides into further versions, but here we will look at Advaita Vedanta, or "non-dual vedanta".

So, Advaita Vedanta, says, no, there is only One. That one is Puruṣa, but they tend to change the language – Atman. And there is the super one, Brahman, but Atman and brahman are the same. All that Prakṛti, that doesn’t exist at all, only Maya, interpreted as ILUSION, makes Atman think it is and to identify with it. Again, this is world denying, ascetic. Get out of the world, become a monk, stay away from women, and meditate, and you will realise that you are Brahman (big S self). Advaita Vedanta tends to be transcendentalist, the great silent stillness (Void, Śunya) is the goal. 

(I should make a little qualification here, this was how Advaita Vedanta was originally argued. In modern times it seems to have taken a step towards the kind of non-dualism that is proposed in the tantric versions.)

"But wait, there's more", says Non-dual Śaiva Tantra!

Non-dual Śaiva Tantra says, but wait there’s more. You missed something. Maya is not Illusion, but concealment and contraction. Through Maya, the Divine is able to manifest the world from itself, as an expression of itself. The powers of the Divine are brought into a contracted form, and then embodiment happens. In fact, then the whole universe happens.

So the map devised by Samkhya still stands, but above it are the limited powers that make everything below possible - we have location and dimension, causality and localisation; sequential time unfolds; desire and craving become an expression of the contraction of perfection; we have knowledge, but on a limited scale compared to omniscience; we can act, we have agency, but not omnipotence.

Maya, the agent of contraction to make it all possible, stands between the limited and the unlimited powers of the Divine. As we follow our map we are now beyond those limitations, tasting those powers: the power of Acting, the power of Knowing, and the power of Willing. 

There are two more powers (plus one). They are the power of Consciousness and the power of Bliss, and they are innate in the next two tattvas as we climb this map, as Śiva and Śakti respectively.  And the plus one? That is off the map and is complete freedom.

Śiva is transcendence, the still point, Śakti is immanence, the flowing energy of everything. Yet they are not really two.  Just as the centre of the wheel and the rim are not two but still one wheel, the centre the still point around which the rim and the rest of the wheel, revolves, but still one wheel, so too these principles of Śiva and Śakti. Tradition would place them side by side but numbering down Śiva would be 1 and Śakti 2, however this numbering is in no way indicating precedence. Śiva and Śakti are equal and could just as easily be interchanged.

This has now built 36 tattvas, or principles of reality and maps the path into manifestation and the path back up the map by which we find our way home. Beyond these 36 is the unenumerable, the Heart, Śiva-Śakti in perfect union.

Reference: Please read Tantra Illuminated by Christopher Wallis to understand more about all things Tantra, especially non-dual Śaiva Tantra.

The thought: "I"

 Have you ever noticed how "I" attaches itself to everything?

For example, it is cold. Immediately there is a thought, "I am cold".

What is the opposite of "I"? The answer might come up as "you", but it is more like anything that is "other". Can you see how "I" is the fundamental separator, dividing experience into what is this body/mind and what is everything else. The "I" thought is the duality thought. 

It comes online around two years old, and it is no accident that this is the age at which childen are really beginning to acquire language, the ability to communicate thought. Without getting into the complex linguistic and psychological hypotheses around this point, language seems to express thought and thought also seems to be shaped by language. 

To illustrate that take this example. I have heard that Inuit languages have many, many words for ice and snow. They live with ice and snow, and have developed more nuanced thoughts about ice and snow, so have more words for ice and snow to express that. In turn, learning their language, that subtley of thought about ice and snow are readily available to them because the language describes it that way.

I digress. The point really is that we have a word, "I" that refers to this body/mind and separates this body/mind for all others. Cutlurally we learn that as we develop. Psychologically it means we develop an ego, a sense of self. And it is pretty darn handy too. We can possess things, we can tell mine for yours. But pause for a minute and consider. It is just a thought!

In our thought processes we give "I" regal status. It owns everything. Whatever happens, I will take almost immediate possession of it.  Even on the meditation cushion, entering a state of Pure Awareness, which by definition is a no-thought state, and there it is: I am aware, As soon as it happens, that's a thought and we are no longer in Pure Awareness. Damn!

I-ness is a great cause of suffering. "I" gets upset whenever its expectations seem thwarted. Watch your moments of conflict. "Other" does something not in alignment with the way "I" would like it, and suffering happens. It is a resistence of reality. 

This ego-identity is also the source of self-images and beliefs, like "I am fat", "I am right", "I am not enough". In fact the ego-identity is nothing more than a whole bunch of I statements. "I am <insert name here>", "I am <insert job here>", "I am <insert position in family (mother, daughter etc.) here>". The ego-identity suvives by the strength with which we believe these statements. 

The ego-identity that the "I" thought represents is defined by Christopher Wallis in Tantra Illuminated (p. 130) in this way:

Ego ... is a persistent contraction of awareness in the form of a collection of self-images that causes suffering through artificial self-limitation.

 Non-dual spritutual awakening requires a loosening of the power of the "I" belief. Many spiritual traditions talk about this ego falling away, viewing it as an enemy. Of course anything that is being rejected, or that we have an aversion to will keep on coming around. 

Richard Miller, creator of iRest®, often talks about self falling away, but he counsels that it will not happen if you do not feel safe with yourself. (Received in in person teaching.) So every promise you make to yourself, keep it. Then perhaps you can go on where the ego cannot go. I find this useful in Yoga Nidra, to take "I" like a little baby, cared for and loved, and place it the cradle of my heart, inviting it to rest there so Awareness can go on alone. Upon return, ego is again assumed, but like the nurse, the police officer etc. put on the uniform of that profession  in order to perform the job, putting on the ego in order to come back into the world, but it is seen through as a kind of ruse. 

Of course, in iRest we also work on the "I" beliefs, challenging ourselves to take their opposites, and bringing them back to the body. Gradually the tenacity of these beliefs about ourselves begins to loosen, and the ruse of the ego is again revealed.

In Non-dual Saiva Tantra (NST), everything is an expression of Supreme Consciousness which contracts itself from a completely unbounded state which is full of potentiality, to express itself as the manifest universe. So the tradition teaches that far from denying the go, all that needs to be done is to expand that which is included in the "I" thought to include everything! One meditation to use in starting to work in this way is to place a beautiful object that you value before you, and meditate on being that object, of including it in your selfhood, by way of a first step in this expansion.

NST also offers us practices where we "burn" away all our self constructs, emptying ourselves for the light of Awareness.

One of the simplest approaches is to just notice the "I" thought attaching itself to everything. See what happens.

Beyond duality

Vitarkabādhane pratikpakṣabhāvanam*

Yoga Sutra 2:33

Translations:

When the mind is disturbed by passions one should practise pondering over their opposites.

Swami Satyananda Saraswati

In order to exclude from the mind questionable things, the mental calling up of those things that are opposite is efficacious for their removal.

William Q. Judge

When distracted by wayward or perverted rationalization, suitable counter measures should be adopted to keep away or remove such obstacles, especially by the contemplation of the other point of view.

Swami Venkatesananda

When negative feelings restrict us, the opposite should be cultivated.

Alistair Shearer

When disturbed by negative thoughts, opposite [positive] ones should be thought of. This is pratipaksha bhavana.

Swami Satchidananada

Cultivating of opposites

The phenomenal world is a world of opposites: Hot/cold, big/little, smart/stupid, black/white, me/you. It is a world of dualistic opposites. It has to be so. Whatever we are experiencing now, the opposite is also here, or at the very least, waiting in the wings. Our thinking is in opposites, our feeling and emoting is in opposites. 

Yoga Sutra 2:33 recognises that we become embroiled in disturbing cognitions and feelings and counsels the cultivation of the opposite. You might ask, if the opposite can always be here too, why do I get caught up in the most uncomfortable of the pair, in distress instead of in comfort? 

This has to do with the way our brain has evolved to keep us safe.  We have a negative bias.  Better that we mistake a stick for a snake than a snake for a stick. What happens though is that we get a bit trapped in the negativity and begin to  suffer.  We believe it, so we suffer.

In this age of the wonders of imaging the brain scientists have now shown how cultivating gratitude for example can change the very structures of the brain, growing the hippocampus and shrinking the amygdala. Cultivation of gratitutde is an example of cultivating the opposite.  When doom and gloom is all around, practice noticing what there is to be grateful for.

Welcoming opposites

The practice becomes even more powerful when we also practice welcoming both sides of the pair, not rejecting that discomforting side, not clinging on to that more comfortable side, but being open to them both.

In the practice of iRest® yoga nidra meditation we do this, moving between the two sides of the pair, welcoming both, whether it is a feeling in the body, such as hot/cold, an emotion and its feeling in the body, such as sad/happy, or a thought or belief, such as I am stupid/I am smart. We always notice how they feel in the body and go between those feelings, not just summoning them as a thought.  What does it feel like to believe I am stupid? What does it feel like to believe I am smart?

Both together

It is when we reach the point where we hold them both together that the really big power moment comes. It is not a merging, but both here together, both opposites at the same time. 

Wow! The resolution opens up to a state that is beyond opposites.  This is a sense of open, welcoming, Presence that is full of equanimity. How so?

Moving beyond duality to the simple way things are

This embodied form incudes all the thoughts, emotions, and every perception that we have, including the me thought. This embodied form is constrained by thought into believing in separation, a me and a you. It is in this state that the opposites arise.

The mind of thoughts is so powerful, and we are so habituated to its illusions, that we need a few tricks if we are to see beyond it and experience another Reality. And one of those little tricks is this work in opposites. When we hold these two opposite constructs of the mind at the same time, we may be able to "see" beyond them to the simple awaring Presence that everything is. 

Everything is. It is not was or will be, it is. 


* vitarka - doubt, discussion, discursive thoughts, passions
   badhane - disturbance, harrassment, torment
   pratipaksha - the opposite
   bhavanam - should be thought of, pondered, state of mind

Its all about Love

Do you know, do you remember, that feeling of falling in love?

Maybe at first you are just loving someone but they don't know and you can't tell them. So you yearn for them. And you do whatever you can to be near them, to flirt a little, to try and reel them in, so to speak!

Then maybe it all comes together and you get to be with the object of your yearning, and there is that heart full feeling and a feeling of connectedness. When you are apart, there's the yearning again. when you are together, connectedness and heart-full-ness.

Sometimes when apart, you smell their perfume, and the heart aches for them.

Awakening is a lot like that. And it is pure love.

In the first instance there is a glimpse of all that is true, just a glimpse, but it sets the heart yearning.  And whenever you stray or forget, eventually the yearning calls you back to the path. Once you have sniffed the perfume of the Truth, it lingers, you catch it here and there.

As Awakening unfolds, it is pure love in the heart. Eventually love is simply streaming everything into existence from your own heart of love. It is pure love touching into the depths of inner stillness, and pure love generating the entire universe.

Love is fullness. Love is complete. Love is compassion and kindness. Love is expansive.

When I was little I must have asked my mother who God is and she told me "God is Love". I think for her God was out there somewhere loving her, me and everything. In the non-dual View however, there is only God/dess. Awakening is the sublime recognition of that in living experience. There is only God/dess. I am that One, everything is that One. And that One is Love.

All you need is love ....

Metaphors of Oneness and forgetting

Here is a saucepan of porridge. As it heats bubbles rise, pop and blop on the surface. For a moment a crater appears, but it then subsides into the mass that is the porridge. Another bubble pops and blops, and subsides, and another and another.

Here is an ocean. On the surface a wave forms, swells, rolls and subsides back into the ocean. Another happens here, and here and here, all waves arising, forming, swelling, rolling, subsiding.

Perhaps each porridge bubble bursting on the surface thinks, I am something, an individual entity, and here in the porridge pot there are others a bit like me but different.

Or perhaps each wave thinks, I am a something, an individual entity, and here with me there are many like me, but different. They are others.

Imagine that. Imagine if you tried to tell each individual porridge bubble or wave that they were not separate but the same, that they are the porridge, or the ocean.

With the vantage point we have from the porridge and the ocean it is easy for us to see that the bubble and the wave are not separate from the porridge and the ocean, so much so that the suggestion that they are seems laughable.

Yet you and I are the same, and yet we find it very difficult to see that we are the same, just little emanations, here, and there, of the one Consciousness. This is the great discovery of non-dual Awakening. There is no separation between anything, it only seems so because we are caught up in a separateness of functionality we sometimes label as ego. Or call it I-ness.

This is no baseless postulation, or insubstantial philosophical musing. There are many who have fallen out of the illusion of separateness, sometimes accidentally, sometimes having made themselves accident prone through their spiritual practices. It is more common than you might think to have had such experiences, even momentarily or for just a little while, of recognising that everything is non-separate, and how the ego simply functions as a tool. It is an unforgettable experience, it changes how you see things, even if the tenacity of identification with the I-dentity reasserts itself, it no longer enjoys a total eclipse of Oneness. Once you've seen it, you cannot really un-see it. You know it, even while you are forgetting, and re-identifying with being a separate I.

A little more uncommon is the experience of waking up to that realisation permanently when the person permanently sees through the functionality of the I and fully feels the flow of one consciousness in everything. We call those people Awakened.

Our bubbles and waves are also metaphors for everything that is coming and going in our experience, be it a sensation, a feeling, emotions or thoughts. They too arise, unfold, perhaps they stay awhile, but then they subside, back into that from whence they came, that One Consciousness. Recognise that and you are already well on the path to recognising everything.

This Vedic verse (Brihadaranyaka Upanishad) prays for that recognition, that awakening:

Om asato mā sad gamaya,
tamaso mā jyotir gamaya,
mṛtyor mā amṛtaṃ gamaya,
Om shanti~ shanti~ shanti hi~~

Om - Lead me from un-truth to Truth
Lead me from darkness to Light
Lead me from death to Immortality
Om peace, peace peace

In the non-dual interpretation, the un-truth, the darkness and death is our forgetting our True Nature. As that One Consciousness, though the body may die, that One Consciousness that we are, manifesting in apparent mortal multiplicity, is in fact immortal.

What the heart most yearns

I have not been able to write in this blog for about six months. It hasn't been because of any crisis, I just had nothing to say. Usually these posts are drawn out of me as a need to be seen. Then by writing once a month for a long time I began to feel an obligation. But for six months there has been nothing needing to be said, or feeling ripe for saying.

An ideal place for meditation
at Brahma Kumari Centre Frankston Vic

My practice has been ever deepening, as it does.

And of course I got so very busy preparing everything in advance for the big trip I took in January. There was simply no time for the reflection it takes to allow these posts to emerge as I put things in place that allowed me to be absent for three weeks. Over the past nine weeks my yoga students on Tuesdays and Saturdays have been coming on that journey with me as I answered the inevitable question, "How was your trip?" fully and honestly.

The trip was a pilgimage led by Christopher "Hareesh" Wallis, a Sanskrit scholar and initiated Tantrik Yoga practitioner with whom I began studies last year. In the combination of Hareesh's scholarship, his practice, extraordinary teaching gift, enormous generosity, his energy and good humour I have discovered offerings that are speaking right to my core. To say that the pilgimage through Tamil Nadu was life-changing sounds like a cliché, but it is true nevertheless.

Thank you to all the students who came on that journey during our yoga classes together over the past nine weeks.  Reliving it with you has been a great consolidation for me and I hope some of its immensity was translated through our classes for you, and you caught the flavour of "How was my trip?". And as we reached it's conclusion something else happened. The Christchurch attack rocked us all to the core.

The Arunachaleswara Temple at Tiruvanamallai (pictured here
 from the Arunachala Mountain) is aligned ona lay line East to
West straight to the heart of the mountain.
Om namah sivaya.
The mantra came alive in me at this temple.

In a video post after that event, Hareesh shared something really special. A Sanskrit prayer for the wellbeing of all. Hareesh posts a lot, and they are all gems of teaching. But this one had a special spark, and was in response to those dreadful events in Christchurch where 50 worshippers were murdered at prayers in their mosques by an extreme right, Australian born terrorist. We were all horrified. This is not who we are. Our hearts were crying.

Three heart to heart chats, with a teacher, a friend and a student contributed to the shift. I must proclaim my own heartfelt yearning and in that public proclamation fully confess, and be, what it is I am called to teach. And I really began that ownership in my Sunday morning class.  Thank you dear people who were present at that Sunday Meditation Body and Mind. I felt totally vulnerable and your support was wonderful.

You can listen to Hareesh's words through the link below, but here is a paraphrase of what he said, a rough transcription, please forgive inaccuracies:

No one can doubt that we are in challenging and troubled times, especially politically and environmentally.  No one who is paying attention can doubt that this quickening, this intensification, can only increase over the next decades. We don’t know what the outcome will be for the survival of our civilisation, of our species, of our planet, and it can feel as if we are standing on the brink sometimes, as we look at the rise of tribalistic ideologies and wondering if humanity will be able to overcome this tribalism which is an instinct in our brains to our evolutionary biology. And of course, the unknown factor here is awakening. In the time of quickening and intensification there are more opportunities for spiritual awakening. And awakening is what allows us to truly transcend our divisiveness within us and between us.  It allows us to transcend this tribalism, it allows us to transcend even our evolutionary instincts and to see ourselves in each other, despite all our differences. Also in a time of quickening and intensification, prayers offered from the deepest heart are more powerful.

"Awakening is what allows us to truly transcend our divisiveness within us and between us. It allows us to transcend this tribalism, it allows us to transcend even our evolutionary instincts and to see ourselves in each other, despite all our differences."

And then, the translation of the first stanza of the prayer:

May the wicked become good. May the good obtain peace. May the peaceful be freed from bonds. May the freed set others free.

It is the perfect storm. In class for the first time I publicly declared my heart's deepest yearning, and I said these words:

I dedicate my practice to awakening. I dedicate my teaching to awakening. 

Oh it is such a long, long time I have known my heart's true yearning. But for a long, long time I also dismissed it as a ridiculous fantasy, or not for the very ordinary folk like me. Engaging with the teachings of Richard Miller through iRest® have shown me it is not pie in the sky. Early flashes of insight were not imagined, and those flashes actually meant I could not not pursue it, no matter how long I looked in another direction. The very ordinary like me (or you) can attain to awakening, to freedom from the bonds of forgetting who we truly are.

Some people distil their Heartfelt Desire to a single word. Mine has been distilled as a feeling for a very long time, but when I turn it into words it is longer, one word does not seem to express it all, at least in English, how big it is! And in the last twelve months the first line was added to it.

Here it is, my heart on a platter. What does my heart yearn?

Stable in awakening

Awake … to Awareness

Open … to Openness

At one with Oneness

Manifesting as loving kindness and compassion.

I am not pretending that my reason for being is anything less. And to the degree that I have been freed from bonds, it is my duty to set others free. And that is the reason why I am called to teach. No pretending.

Which doesn't mean that I will not lead many wonderful movement classes where we stretch and strengthen and explore yoga posture, hathayogasana. Or that I will not also be dedicated to sharing how you might move more freely and with less stiffness and pain. Only in every class I teach I will no longer pretend that my personal goal is anything but being fully awakened, and as far as I have explored that path and fully embodied it, I am a teacher of that path.

Well it may have been obvious for some time, but it is also true that I have tried not to scare folk off with all this spiritual stuff.  But hey, it is who I am, it is my calling, now I am owning it.

What is your true heartfelt desire, your yearning? Are you, like I have for so long, not fully acknowledging it? I have to say, it feels totally liberating to have put it out there.

Here are the words and translation of that lovely Sanskrit prayer.

Durjanaḥ sajjano bhῡyāt

Sajjanaḥ śāntim āpnuyāt

Śānto mucyeta bandhebhyo

muktaś cānyān vimocayet

May the wicked become good. May the good obtain peace. May the peaceful be freed from bonds. May the freed set others free.

Svasti prajābhyaḥ paripālayantām

Nyāyyena mārgena mahim mahīśāḥ

Go-brāhmaṇebhyaḥ śubham astu nityaṁ

Lokāḥ samastāḥ sukhino bhavantu

Blessings on the subjects of those who are ruling, and may these great leaders rule the earth in a just manner. May food always be the lot of animals and spiritual practitioners. May all people be happy.

Kāle varṣatu parjanyaḥ

Pṛthivī śasya-śālinī

Deśo’yam kṣobha-rahito

brāhmaṇāḥ santu nirbhayāḥ

May it rain at the right time. May the earth have storehouses full of grain. May this country be free of disturbances. May spiritual practitioners be free of persecution.

Sarve bhavantu sukhinaḥ

Sarve santu nirāmayāḥ

Sarve bhadrāṇi paśyantu

Mā kaścid-dukha-bhāg-bhavet

May all be happy. May all be healthy. May all see only auspicious sights. May no one have a share in sorrow.

Sarvas taratu durgāni

Sarvo bhadrāṇi paśyatu 

Sarvaḥ kāmān avāp-notu

Sarvaḥ sarvatra nandatu

May everyone surmount their difficulites. May everyone see only auspicious sights. May everyone have their heartfelt desires fulfilled. May everyone everywhere be glad.

Svasti mātra-uta pitre no astu

Svasti ghobhyo jagate puruṣebhyaḥ

Viśvam subhῡtaṁ suvidatraṁ no astu

Jyogeva dṛśyema sῡryam.

May blessings fall on our mother and father; blessings on the animals, the people and the earth. May everything of ours flourish and be an aid to wisdom. And long may we see the sun.

Om śāntiḥ śāntiḥ śāntiḥ

Om peace peace peace

You can watch Hareesh's post and hear his beautiful voice intone the prayer here

Different views and details of a box made at a Sankalpa workshop
in 2018. I placed this box on the altar during class when I shared my heart.

On returning from retreat, Frankston June 2016

So, how was retreat?

I have become breakfast, tissues scintillating like Coco Pops;  

I am spread thinner than vegemite with the butter showing through.  

I have become the sound of softly falling rain. 

I am champagne feeling the bubbles rise and burst. 

As ripples circling around the duck on the pond 

I ripple in all directions. 

Driving, I am flying, senses spread from horizon to horizon 

the air blowing through me. 

Rolling to the red light, I cease to exist in stillness. 

I am spread taut across the universe 

so the Beloved can play infinite rhythms upon my membranes. 

Delight is shimmering here, and there, can’t you feel it?

It was lovely, thank you.

©Tina Shettigara 2016

[Note for non-Australians: the Australian national breakfast spread, Vegemite, is hated by just about everyone else in the world, probably because when they first try it they spread it thick like jam. The only way to eat Vegemite is to spread it very thin.]

Image credit http://blogs.acu.edu.au/international/15898/the-truth-about-vegemite/

The dance of ever renewing delight

I recently spent a week on retreat, in silence, while also being in community. Try imagining sitting in a dining room full of other people and talking to no-one. Many find it impossible to imagine.

What a treat it was! And a week did not seem long enough in the end.

Silence doesn't only mean "not talking". It means "not doing anything that will take you away from the ongoing meditation and stilling of the fluctuations of the mind". Pretty much no texting, emailing, reading the frivolous, like Facebook,. I didn't take a computer, and the only book I had was my handbag sized copy of the Yoga Sutras interpretively translated by Swami Venkatesananda, as it goes wherever my handbag goes. I did indeed open and read it on a few occasions at night and during the long afternoon breaks, finding that it could take me deeper, rather than taking me away.

Another text that might have also taken me deeper would have been the Radiance Sutras had I thought to take it. Many of the meditation practices we did on retreat were from the Radiance Sutras.

The retreat was titled "Embodied Awakening" and was led by a very talented teacher, Anne Douglas. The title indicates that the body itself is a gateway to awakening. As we come into a heightened sensitivity to information of the body we start to open all of our perception, including to the experiences that are beyond the body.

Through repeated body-sensing practices, meditation and Yoga Nidra, and by not interspersing this with the things that would take us away, we began to enter a more awake state.  An awakeness that is awake no matter what the state of the body, awake even if the body sleeps, dreaming or dreamless, and awake in a vaster sense than ordinary wakeful states.

The Radiance Sutras are Lorin Roche's beautiful, modern, interpretive translation of the Vijnana Bhairava Tantra (c.800CE), a lovely text from the tradition of Kashmir Shaivism. The title of this post is taken from Sutra 156.

Let me share Sutras 155 -156 with you.

155
Breath flows
Into this body
As a nectar of the gods. 

Every breath is a whisper
Of the Goddess:
"Here is the ritual I ask of you -
Be the cup
Into which I pour this bliss,
The elixir of immortal peace." 

156
The breath flows out with the sound sa,
The breath flows in with the sound ha.
Thus thousands of times a day,
Everyone who breathes is adoring the Goddess. 

Know this, and be in great joy.
Listen to the ongoing prayer that is breath.
Life shall dance in you
A dance of ever-renewing delight.

Perhaps you are put off by this talk of "the Goddess" so lets talk about that. Who is this Goddess?

The text comes from the tradition of Kashmir Shaivism. The "Goddess" is, at a story-telling level, the consort of Shiva, who is sometimes called Parvati, but also is known as Shakti. But such terms are actually metaphorical. This God and Goddess are not personalities, they are the Universe, and they are in fact one. The Goddess is the energetic aspect of Consciousness that causes manifestation. In other words, Shakti causes Divine Consciousness to pulse, and matter to come into being. These concepts have a very nice correlation with astrophysics!

So everything is really Shiva-Shakti, and you can experience this, in your body. Your body becomes a pathway to knowing the Divine and a pathway to returning to the knowledge of your True Nature. So the 112 meditations of the Vijnana Bhairava are 112 gateways of the body to returning to your True Nature.

Here in these two sutras our gateway is the breath. "Be the cup into which I pour this bliss", be receptive to the breath, "be in great joy", "listen to the ongoing prayer", "life shall dance in you".

So next time you are lying quietly - in savasana at the end of your next yoga practice perhaps, or even in bed tonight, waiting for sleep, be receptive, open, listen, feel and quietly let this wondrous experience of the breath be meditation and prayer.

There is a poem about how I was feeling when I returned from retreat here.

You might also be interested in a previous post, Siva - Sakti.

Dealing with negative thoughts and emotions

When we are in emotional turmoil thoughts can go around and around in our head. They become so persistent that we cannot sleep or concentrate on any other job. The emotions that accompany them threaten to overwhelm us. In the worst times we become quite dysfunctional and mentally unwell.

For example, perhaps we lost a job or broke up with our partner. Beliefs about ourselves that have their origins in childhood may arise, such as "I am not good enough", "there is something wrong with me", "I am stupid", or "I am unlovable". And with each of these beliefs comes wave after wave of emotion, such as sadness, anger, shame and guilt. The emotion reinforces the belief and the belief reinforces the emotion.

Not surprisingly we find these emotions and beliefs uncomfortable and we regard them as negative, and something to get rid of. So we resist them, try to push them away, suppress them. This might work for awhile, until something else happens, and those old beliefs are arising again and along with them come all of those "negative" emotions.

We want to know how can we deal with these negative thoughts and emotions and be rid of them forever?

Properly understood, all experiences are signposts to guide us back to our inherent wholeness. We take such emotions and beliefs to be "negative" only when we misunderstand their role and lack the skills to welcome them and receive their messages. 

When we truly welcome and observe all emotional experiences, all thoughts and beliefs, we cease to mistakenly identify with them and learn to recognise that they truly are just passing through. 

In so much as I am sad in this moment I can also be happy. I have emotions, but I am not my emotions. I can observe my emotions pass through, and I can enquire into them, discover a belief that is accompanying them, explore the belief, discover all the messages they are bringing me. I can also invoke and welcome the opposite belief and emotion, so I know that none of it is permanent.

Be drawn to the practices and wisdom teachings that help you to learn to meet and greet whatever arises. Learn to be curious about the felt sense in the body of any emotion and to watch it pass through. Learn to recognise the temporary nature of all movements of the mind, and how to remain at ease in every situation. Recognise that no thought or emotion is truly a negative experience, they just are, and they all have a valuable message that will show you the way home to your inherent wholeness.

The practices we are given in iRest®, whether as Yoga Nidra or meditation, establish a safe place to practice and develop our skills in meeting all that arises. It nurtures us to be open and welcoming and always at ease in every situation. These are ancient teachings that cross many cultures as the poem by Rumi below attests. But in iRest they are packaged to be accessible to us in our modern world.

Translation by Coleman Barks. Image from www.yearofjoys.com

Cultivating right attitudes

First published in "on the Mat", the newsletter of Yoga Spirit Studios

Switching on the news can be quite depressing can't it? We should ensure we are informed about what is happening in our world, hiding our heads in the sand will not help. But there is so much violence, and so many people swept up in terror, death and destruction. I find myself very moved by it and frustrated too that as individuals we can do nothing to change it.

What we can do is cultivate the right attitudes in our own heart, ensure that we are wiring our own brains towards non-violence.

Non-violence, or ahimsa is the first practice that Patanjali offers in the Yoga Sutras, the very first of the yamas, which is the first of the eight limbs of yoga he lays out in Book 2, the Book on Practice.

However today I am drawn by a sutra in Book 1, sutra 33.

The mind becomes quiet when it cultivates

friendliness in the presence of happiness, 

active compassion in the presence of unhappiness, 

joy in the presence of virtue 

and indifference toward error. 

Sounds easy enough. But is it? In this sutra we are being given the clue to much needed equanimity in the face of all we meet, equanimity that will guide us into right action to fulfill our responsibilities.

Friendliness in the face of happiness: Sometimes another's success serves to remind us of our own failings and this may set our minds in an unfriendly direction. cultivate friendliness. Note the feelings of unfriendliness if they arise, invite it in, and then also invite friendliness. Move back and forwards between them. You will find that the unfriendliness loosens its grip upon you and you have cultivated friendliness.

Active compassion in the presence of unhappiness: It is relatively easy to be compassionate in the face of a friend's bereavement but what about the unhappiness of a homeless person, or a drunk or drug addict. Faced with the homeless person, drunk or drug addict, right there in front of us, do we feel compassion or aversion? First we can note that tendency, but then can we open ourselves to be with the other's suffering, acknowledging our oneness?

Joy in the presence of virtue: Is there a contraction present when we see the good works of others, perhaps because we feel ourselves to be unworthy or incapable of such giving? Note that. Then can we cultivate, feel its opposite as joy?

Indifference towards error: Why indifference? Does that mean we should not act when error is present, as in the bombing of children or passenger planes? The lesson here is to note the passion, the sadness, the anger, and the sense of impotence that arises in the face of error, note it and welcome it, and then chose equanimity, (indifference) as its opposite and cultivate that. Then we can act from the correct place, we can respond rather than react.

So much of the ever spiralling vortices of violence we see are fuelled by unskillful reaction based on hatred and fear. Patanjali offers another way and what better place to start than with ourselves, where we can act to make a change.

The Egg

As it is Easter I have been reflecting on all things Easter. Naturally eggs came up. I have always wondered about the place of eggs in the Easter story. A Sunday School teacher once told me it is to represent the stone that was rolled away from the tomb. Others naturally point to its new life symbolism, and that Christ's resurrection is a new life and it offers us a new life too.

The egg is a symbol that occurs across many faiths and traditions, often featuring in cosmology or stories of creation as well. It seems to come into the Christian tradition from earlier practices, reinterpreted. Red stained eggs, to symbolise the blood of Christ, were used in the early Eastern church, and there are stories that accompany this. But we know that coloured and decorated eggs were also features of other and earlier societies as well, including in the ancient Indian Vedas, the source of yoga itself.

The Brahmanda is the "cosmic egg", the totality of the universe. "Brahm" means "cosmos", "expanding", "biggest" and "creator". "Anda" means "egg" (pronounced with a long first a - aanda). The cosmos is conceived of as a giant egg, a giant, expanding egg.

This has a rather lovely resonance with modern scientific cosmology.We now know that the universe is indeed expanding, knowledge which came out of Einstein's theory of general relativity, predicted by Alexander Friedmann and observed by Edwin Hubble, There is also the notion that there was at some time a point of singularity, a minuscule gravitational dot out which the expanding universe arose, expanding in all directions, and continuing to do so. In the Vedas that would be called the "bindu", or it might be the "anda" at its smallest.

Science has yet to offer an explanation for the big bang that set all this expanding off.

Brahmanda is seen as simultaneously the bindu, source of all, and the macrocosm, all that is manifest. The manifest arises out of and within the whole, which is Universal Consciousness, Awareness. Yoga's goal, the union that is right there in the name "yoga", is our ultimate recognition of our being one with that Universal Consciousness.

So the egg in yoga can also symbolise a new life, awake to the full grace of Awareness.

Hari Om Tat Sat.

Patience, perseverance, optimism and faith

Ram Dass wrote in his book Be here, now: "If you think you are enlightened, go and visit your family." The message is that the road is long and the potholes many if we are applying ourselves to our personal growth, the spiritual journey.

I often disappoint myself! Just when I think I am making progress, peeling off the layers of conditioning and learning to respond from the supportive home ground of Being, I bump up against my limitations and I react. Rats!

No point in cursing. I just have to welcome the limitation and get back to the meditation, and practise, practise, practise. Keep on dipping into Awareness, practising meeting what arises with welcoming, and repeating the heartfelt desire expressing that I am not limited by all of that conditioning.

I remain hopeful and am grateful for the fabulous tools that yoga teaches us. It can take some time to find the tools that will resonate for our unique vibration. I am also grateful that I have found the tools of iRest® Yoga Nidra, with its core principles of Well-being, Welcoming and Witnessing Awareness, and its delectable practises.

Your path may be different. Yours might be fishing or walking and the meditative experience that gives you! Whatever our path, at the end of the day we need patience, perseverance and optimism to stay the course.  We might fall off, but we can always jump back on.

We also need faith.  Not blind faith, but faith that we do have the tools that will serve us well and guide us home. I wish you all faith in your path. Om shanthi.

Shiva - Shakti

Everything manifests as a duality. Can you think of the idea of hot, if there were no cold?

In Indian philosophy, Shiva and Shakti are like this, the one does not exist without the other.

Shakti, from the Sanskrit "Shak" - "to be able", is the enabler, the dynamic force which manifests the Universe.

Shiva is the transcendent ground of being.

Without Shakti, the ground of being remains unmanifested and all that we call our physical reality would not exist.

Different cultures have intuited Shakti by different names, but most have a divine feminine, a Great Mother figure.

Have you ever moved amongst great, old trees and felt an undeniable force emanating, a force that evoked feelings of reverence, even though you may not have had a philosophical or spiritual framework to reference it? At such times we are sensing into Shakti.

In yoga we sensitise ourselves to flows of energy in our bodies. Any flow of energy is Shakti.

So although Shakti is characterised as feminine and Shiva as masculine, both are present within all of us, men and women.